Gone Fishin'

Tim and I and the kids went fishing. The good news? Collin LOVED IT!!! He caught the one and only fish of the day. Tim and I learned quickly that we must find a better fishing spot in the future. But all in all we had fun.
The bad news? Mary Grace HATED IT!!! She didn't like the bait, the worms, the bugs buzzing around, or the fish! I guess she's not gonna be the "outdoorsy" type. There were some tears shed on her part and a lot of "I'm never gonna bring you along again Mary Grace" on her dad's part.
But she survived and she will be forced in the future to go fishing against her will. Our family is a loving monarchy, not a democracy.

Me Me Me Me Me

Tim and I back in college - looking "cheesy"




























Tim and I after a few years of marriage had "learned us good"!




"Me me me me me" is a little tune Tim likes to sing. He sings it like a vocalist warming up before a performance. Can you hear it? Okay, good. Now you must know that he is not trying to impress me with his vocal talents but rather is mocking me and shaming me into an attitude reversal. When I begin to have a royal pity party for myself and begin sentence after sentence with "I" he sings this little tune. It goes something like this:



"I want to go somewhere for a change. I want to get out too and do what I want like the other moms. I want to have more time to myself. I want to come and go for once as I please. I want to be pregnant and nursing free for more than a couple of months in my life..." then Tim will cut off this pity party with a little "Me, me, me, me, me".



We both start laughing and usually I'll hit him in the shoulder and say "Alright, alright - you're right. Just let me vent a little ok?"



We both use this little tune whenever we see one another (or others even), becoming a little more than self-absorbed. It's our little inside joke, and we love it! It is a great way to stop each other from going down that dangerous "me" path and getting back on track to a life devoted to others. You have to be able to catch yourself and laugh at yourself if you ever expect to change for the better.



A while back I wrote a post titled Growing Up or Growing Old?. Where I talk about all the benefits of marrying and having a family YOUNG! These are the kinds of things we've learned and developed together to help one another "grow up" over the past ten years. I know that some people, many people looked at us back then and thought "hell, they'll never make it"but how wrong they were! I truly believe it only BENEFIT TED us to be young, poor, and struggling. It kept us humble and it made us search for answers and dig deep inside to persevere. It made us stronger and we are better for it now. Too many people want to start off married life and family life when life is ideal and all seems so "perfect". Then they say they are "ready" to "settle down". But I feel like today we've replaced being "ready" with being completely self-indulged and spoiled. By that time it's next to impossible to undertake the self-sacrifice and selflessness that marriage and family life demands of you for its success. People get a tune stuck in their head and they just can't shake it. And it goes something like this "Me, me, me, me, me......."

The Quiet Man

This movie was on last week on one of the cable channels. It is one of my favorite movies. I love the kind of man that is the main character, Sean. He is just about the quintessential man for me at least. He is strong without being overbearing. He is honorable and dignified without being pretentious or self-righteous. He is handsome without being overly "groomed" or a "girly-man" as I like to call them "pretty boys". For those of you who have not seen this movie - see it! Rent it from the video store and enjoy.

I actually watched it a second time around with my 2 oldest girls. There is some mature content but it is easily explained and "softened" for the mind of a 9 year old. This is because things are implied and not shown like modern movies which show anything and everything possible. (Even the stuff we'd rather NOT see - yuck!) Anyhow, we all loved it! I talked with the girls about tradition and customs and of honor. We watched how patient Sean was with trying to please his wife who was EXTREMELY stubborn and proud. We had a great time, just us girls, watching this wonderful love story.

One of My Favorite Places To Go

One of my favorite places to go visit is Notes from the Trenches. It is a FANTASTIC blog that NEVER fails at making me laugh. Out loud. Often I speak to my computer screen like I'm speaking to a friend. I really wish I knew this woman. She has a writing style I envy and a sense of humor that is witty a and ALWAYS 100% dead on! Here is a sample of her writing and her attitude which keeps me coming back for more...


She writes...

"Sometimes it is hard to tell if they are well intentioned and poorly written, or asking exactly what they seem to be.
Today this email graced my inbox. I reprint it here in it’s entirety.

Did you always want a large family, or did they just start coming out faster than you knew what you were getting yourself into?
Just Wondering.

I could have emailed back privately, but I thought that other people might want to know the same thing. So here is my response.
Dear Just wondering,
Yes that is exactly what happen. Babies started shooting out of my crotch like ice cubes from a jammed ice cube dispenser, while I screamed, “Make it stop! Make it stop! My uterus runneth over!” "



You MUST stop by her blog and read some of her other entries as well. She is thoughtful and sweet. She has a deep love and devotion for her family. She is a great example of what it means to be a "traditional" Christian mother who manages to keep her individuality and her humor in tact.

Fatherhood

Dad Quotes:
Douglas Macarthur:
"By profession I am a soldier and take pride in that fact.
But I am prouder – infinitely prouder – to be a father.
A soldier destroys in order to build;
the father only builds, never destroys.
The one has the potentiality of death;
the other embodies creation and life.
And while the hordes of death are mighty,
the battalions of life are mightier still.
It is my hope that my son, when I am gone,
will remember me not from the battle field
but in the home repeating with him our simple daily prayer,
'Our Father who art in Heaven.'"

Fatherhood

Bill Cosby quotes: “Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.”
Bill Cosby quotes (American Actor, Comedian and Producer)

This is the kind of emotion based non thinking comments which rule the hot button issues of our day

This is a quote from the Chicago Sun Times article I reference in my post Self Love Becomes Self Worship........Anti-gay marriage question blocked from 2008 ballot: "Jean Chandler, 62, of Cambridge, came with fellow members of her Baptist church in an effort to rebuff the image that strict followers of the Bible are opposed to gay marriage.
''I think being gay is like being left-handed,'' Chandler said. ''If we decided left-handed people couldn't marry, what kind of society would we be?'' "

Happy Birthday Miriam

A little late but not without a LOT of LOVE!!!

I would have used a RECENT photo.

But your mom never sends me any.

There IS something called the internet and photos do very well being sent via it....hint hint.....

Self Love Becomes Self Worship

You turn on the tv or the radio anymore and you'll hear something about the "oppressed" gays. It is said they are mistreated, denied their basic rights, and otherwise rejected by society. We are told that this is unkind, unfair, and even unchristian. A loving, accepting society is one in which we embrace our gay brothers and sisters and applaud them for their sexual behavior. A forward thinking open-minded culture is one in which we encourage our children to explore all options and interests in regards to their sexuality. It doesn't hurt anyone for gays to love one another and to be together openly. So why make a big deal about it?




It's a big deal because it does hurt people. First and foremost it hurts the gays themselves. Secondly it degrades the sex act and reduces it to an urge to be satisfied as we see fit. This leads to a level of shallowness that robs us of our humanity and our God given identities.









Why the big surge in "gayness"? Some will say that it isn't a surge at all. They would argue that the number of "out" gays is greater only because of the greater acceptance of it. They've been here all along... I couldn't disagree more. I believe that the rise in number and "openness" of gays is directly related to the promotion of self-love at all costs by our culture.









The traditional more conservative culture of the early 20th century has been depicted as one of oppression, rigid orthodoxy, and unhealthy sexual attitudes. Some of this may well be true. But the revolution which happened in the 60's and which continues today does not distinguish between those attitudes and norms which these earlier "oppressive" generations held and the unhealthy or unfair practices that may have accompanied them. One example might be the attitude that men being the stronger sex should "rule" their homes and wear the proverbial "pants". This old well-accepted norm of the past is not in of itself wrong. It may have been abused and misinterpreted by some to mean men can bully their wives and act as supreme dictators over women generally. But to throw out a natural truth such as men are stronger and should therefore act as protectors and guardians of women and children and lead them, because of these abuses, is simply short sighted and irrational.









The same holds true for the norms and attitudes held in the sexual arena. It used to be that sex was for making babies and creating families. It was an accepted attitude that the most basic unit of society was man, woman, and child. This foundation was held in such esteem that the sex act was therefore confined to the establishment of the family alone. This may have been, like my earlier example, abused and misinterpreted by many to mean that men and women are simply "breeders" and "producers" of a good citizen "product". But this abuse does not negate the basic truth of man+woman+child=family=basic foundational unit of every good society. It should not require ANY religious convictions to see the logic and truth in this. Doesn't it just make plain sense? Not anymore.

The state of Mass. has not only enshrined the "right" to marry someone of the same sex but has now also barred its citizens from voting on the matter for themselves. It seems the state legislature and the courts feel that they know better. They can't allow the backwards masses to determine something as important as this. What if they got it wrong and reverted back to tradition (eeww yuck - how unsophisticated)? This goes to show that those in positions of authority and power have no respect for the voters beyond just getting their vote into office. It's as if our leaders are saying "Just vote me in you horse's ass and then shut up and let me lead you where I know you need to go." and then the masses sit idly by and let this happen term after term...








Why has this particular issue been relegated to the "religious right"? Is "traditional" marriage no longer seen as "mainstream"? When did it become "radical" to view one man's and one woman's union to one another, as THE essential rock bed of civilized society? What we are saying when we enshrine this standard in our laws is that this is the ultimate, the superior, the ideal union. Yes, it is possible for something to be superior to another. Why is this so? There is no better union than one man and one woman because together they form a bond which reflects the very best of humankind. Together they reflect ideals which raise up a society. Together they reinforce everything that is good about humankind - cooperation, complementarity, selflessness, life-affirmation, preservation, and promotion, and ultimately continuity and permanence of purpose.







There are those who would argue that a same sex couple can demonstrate and reflect these same ideals. They can exhibit the best of human nature, humankind too. Ah, but they cannot. They can as individuals be perfect mirrors of many virtues and values which support and lift up our society. They can as individuals reinforce the value of human life, the dignity of the person, the value of friendship and self-sacrifice. But the moment they become sexually united to a person of the same sex they have lost this ability to represent themselves as a couple. They are a walking contradiction. They are not and can never be in fact "one" with the one they love. This isn't mere biology. This goes deep deep to the heart of our spiritual natures. We are not just flesh and blood - animals. We have a deeper purpose and call. I feel like most agnostics, even atheists would agree with this. They may not say we have a "soul" but they may say that our intellect lifts us up to a level beyond the reach of all other species. Then what does this superiority demand of us?








The mistake modern society makes is that they respond to this truth (that we are "higher" than all other life on earth) with presumption not responsibility. They presume that this entitles us to do as we please without restraint or consequence. They fail to see the weight of this status. We are higher so therefore we are called to something higher. Yet, we get it wrong again and again. "We are higher, therefore I can do all the lower things I please and still call myself enlightened." This is modern self love, self worship at its core.







We are constantly told to love ourselves. This IS a good thing. But we lose our way when we define love as license. We say love shouldn't hurt. But it does. And it SHOULD! So how do we love ourselves? We indulge ourselves in every whim and pleasure. Then, we call it a right and finding other like-minded people, call ourselves an oppressed minority. Because sexual desire is so powerful and also so very important biologically and more so, spiritually, we go after this area with intensity of purpose! Gays MUST have their right to satisfy their sexual needs and desires. Gays MUST have a right to marry a person of the same sex and act as a "family" as they see fit. Gays have equal status as citizens of this country and it is wrong to deny them their rights. I agree with this last statement whole heartily. I disagree however with the notion that a gay man or woman should be able to "join with" another gay person of the same sex and say this "union" is EQUAL to one man and one woman.








Our obsession with self-love has turned many into self-worshippers. This is the reason that homosexuality is on the rise. This, along with many other sexual sins, greed, crime, materialism, and vanity - all plagues of the 21st century. We have replaced God with ourselves and in doing so we rationalize every selfish behavior as simple "self-love". I must love myself you know. I must accept myself the way I am. Not at all my friends. Where is the progress in that line of thinking? Can't you see how illogical it is? "I must accept myself the way I am" is the mark of total stagnation and self-rot - not GROWTH! We should and must always be trying to improve ourselves. It is an act of genuine love to push ourselves, even when it hurts, to be better and reach higher. It is a genuine act of love to push others, gay people for example, to reach higher even if it hurts.







Those who reject gay marriage don't hate gays. They love the Truth. For many, when the truth hurts they simply call it a lie. Somehow we must convey our message of love, genuine love, with love to our gay brothers and sisters and to the world. We must be able to say BECAUSE I love you I oppose what you want or what you do. It is a simple truth demonstrated every day in a family. I cannot allow those I love do those things which may bring them great pleasure now, if those things will bring them only pain and ultimate sadness later and for all eternity. This is real love.

Dads Matter

Reuniting Father's With Their Families: "Eighty-five percent of prisoners, 78% of high school dropouts, 82% of teenage girls who become pregnant, the majority of drug and alcohol abusers—all come from single-mother-headed households. Less than 1% of any of these categories come from single-father-headed households. This seems to indicate that the problems children encounter are not related to single-parent households, but are related specifically to single-mother-headed households. So, should we blame the mothers or the fathers? Perhaps, neither. There is no question that father-absence has reached epidemic proportions. According to Wade Horn of the National Fatherhood Initiative, we must reverse the trend in seven to eight years or it will be too late to do so."


This research just supports what I've felt all along. Dads are the parent who "grounds" their family. A mother is an essential part of bringing up a happy healthy child but she herself relies on her husband to be her foundation. As women we must get over our inferiority complex and just admit this. We need men. Our husbands are the ROCK we build our families upon. Of course Jesus is the ROCK fathers support themselves by... Whether our egos like it or not there is a hierarchy to a family and the men are second in command only to God Himself.
For this reason it is better for the children to be raised by a single dad than a single mother (all things being equal) because women tend to falter when pushed to the edge without a man there to support them. They may be financially successful and intellectually competent, but at the end of the day every woman only stands to benefit from the safety and security and protection only her husband can provide for her and her children.

Choice for Men - If women can back out of parenthood through abortion then so must men have this option as well

Metroactive News & Issues Choice for Men: "'I think we still believe in this culture, despite all these years of feminism, that men are supposed to support women and children,' DeCrow says. 'We also believe that men should pay for sex. So if a man has sex with a woman and she becomes pregnant, he must support her. That's where the cultural standard is right now.' "
And this is a bad thing? This woman feels that it is. This entire article on "choice" for men is very eye-opening. Talk about the "slippery slope"!! In truth the men who support this garbage have a fair intellectual argument here. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. If women are always saying that we are equal we are the same in all things except genitalia then it only makes sense that men should have the same right to reject parenthood that woman now have under the law.
The sad thing is that we have so stripped our culture of the honor and dignity that marriage and family bring to an individual that we now have produced an entire generation of young people who will avoid it at all costs. They see both marriage and family as a necessary burden we endure for the sake of the perpetuation of our species. I am sure that if and when science comes up with a way to COMPLETELY remove human contact and connection from the begetting of new life (this would require a replacement for a mother's womb as we already have in vitro etc) many will shout with glee and say "Now we are finally our own masters! We are free!" How easily Satan can make our chains appear to be keys which unlock.

"soft" Men Aren't Men at All

I'm partial to "manly" men. Plainly put - men who act like and talk like men. I've NEVER been very fond of those "sensitive" types who cry at the drop of a hat and/or get a "male manicure".

Metro-sexuals? - YUCK!



There are advantages and disadvantages when a woman accepts men for who and what they are. It can be difficult to understand the lack of discussion and analysis, the simple cut and dry responses, the matter of fact statements free of sweetening or softening. It can be hard at times to understand what exactly is the draw of televised sports. It's men's nature to be less self-less and self-sacrificing than us women. This is the most frustrating I think. We are biologically made to be "givers" We give our bodies up, hand them over to another. We carry another within us and feed and protect this little one. We feed our babies from our breasts. We nurture, guide, hold, rock, cuddle, stay up all night, listen to every story without a point or ending in sight. We always eat last if we eat at all. We go out to buy ourselves a new pair of shoes cause ours are worn through and we come home with something for the kids instead. I could go on...
Men are not like this by nature. They can develop these skills but it doesn't come "built in". But this is as it should be. This is why we (men and women) NEED each other. These men need us just as we need them. This is exactly why it is dangerous to start "softening" our boys and form them in our image. Men need to be men. When the time comes (often this is after years of being married to a very patient and persevering woman) a man will learn how to incorporate the very best virtues women have to offer while still keeping his manhood in tact. If you try to rush this process you end up creating a bunch of boys that never quite make it to manhood and then cover for this by calling it sophistication or worse, progress!
















"I'm glad I didn't have to fight in any war. I'm glad I didn't have to pick up a gun. I'm glad I didn't get killed or kill somebody. I hope my kids enjoy the same lack of manhood.
Tom Hanks
US movie actor (1956 - ) "

What We've Been Up To Lately...

Doing school at the patio table.


















Getting frustrated with all this "MATH stuff ".



















Back to the books in an effort to finish up quickly and then join the others in running through the sprinkler as our "recess" activity.

Collin's face while being scolded for leaving the yard (again).




















Our garden in the back yard. Tomatoes, cauliflower, string beans, collards, cucumbers, and strawberries.


















Monica on her bike on the patio.
















Monica saying "Cheeeeese".




















Looking at a cicada.




















Talking about the cicadas with gram and gramp - Gram gives us a short lesson...


























Running through the sprinkler with Aaron on an unusually hot May day.





















Mary grace in the sandbox. (Looking lovely)


















Morgan in the sandbox. (looking lovely too)

















Monica in the "fort" with aaron and Collin playing "kill the bad guys".


















Mary Grace's family in clay. (just the kids - Morgan, herself, Collin, Monica, and the new baby which she's SURE is gonna be a boy)



















Playing on the "fort".

Money Does NOT Equal Class!

As I sit here at 2:10 AM in the morning (Sunday morning) a group of young men/boys camps out next door in a large tent in their backyard. It is a beautiful night. It is cool and perfect sleeping weather - but neither myself nor these neighbors are asleep. I have been lying awake for the past hour due to laughter and loud voices coming from that tent.

Have I turned into a cranky old neighbor lady who's lost her memory of what it is to be young, giggly and sleep deprived? NO!! Not at all! What I am is a woman who is irritated, sickened, and (literally) shaking from anger. I have ended up here, in front of this computer, in order to restrain myself from marching over there and giving a group of "young men" a piece of my mind!

I wish I could provide some kind of audio for you all to listen to. But the following sampling will have to suffice. Here's what I've been hearing from my bedroom window for the past hour, hour and a half...

"Hey fag**t, suck my di** ok?" "Shut up bit**" "You fu**ing homo you need to stop having unprotected sex with your dog." "Bit** go fu** your mama" "You fu**ing wetback" "Ya, nice tits you have there" "Your mama's tits..." "My di** is ..." "Hey you cracker little homo get off ..." "Bit** you better not..." "Go to fu**ing sleep you little bit**"................................

This is but a sampling of the crap I've had to listen to on this beautiful night. Shut my windows? Sure, I could do that and turn the a/c on. But why should I have to? What sickens me the most in times like these (because this isn't the FIRST incident like this) is that Tim and I left our old neighborhood which was starting to be encroached by gangs and drugs etc., and moved here to "escape". Mind you we also moved because we were "trading up" for a "better neighborhood" and a bigger/better/newer house. Our house is in fact bigger, better and newer. But as for the neighborhood? The home values are 3-4 times that of our old neighborhood but the people who reside within their walls have NO CLASS at all!

In my old neighborhood, sure if I took the girls for a walk down to the park we'd see a bum drinking from a paper bag on the bench there and all the equiptment had graffiti/foul language written on it. But for goodness sakes I've got a brand new house in an "upper middle class" neighborhood now. It seems the bums now live right next door to me and the "graffiti" is audible and polluting my air!

This TRASH that lives next door to me is light years away from showing the same kind of class and decency that my old neighbors had. Yes, in their little 1950's bungalows with detached garages lived a better "class" of people than I've found here on a street where the average home price is around $400,000.(that's a lot for Illinois) My old neighborhood was filled with people of different races, levels of education, and ages. You'd see a statue of the Blessed Mother prominently displayed in some front yards. You'd see old men walking to and from the grocery store or the bakery which were nearby but still quite a "hike". But the older couples would help us "younger ones" out with bringing up our trash cans or sealing our driveways. They'd gush over our kids and warmly congratulate us on pregnancies.

Not so here in whitey white sterilized suburbia. Here we have neighbors who gather around to mumble under their breaths in horror when a new family moves in and (gasp) "Oh no! they have BLACK children!" I won't even tell you the HORRIBLE things that Tim and I heard concerning that! Neighbors who "compete" over landscaping and make derogatory comments about those who haven't "done enough with their yards" We are guilty as charged. I always say it's because we'd rather our "landscape" be filled with flowers of the human variety. Here every kid has a motorized vehicle by the age of 2. You know the kind. The mini hum-v or the tiny jeep. Every 3rd bay is filled with toys and gadgets galore. Everybody has an oversized SUV but only 2 kids. (we have a suburban but our family actually takes up all the seats) Here we have people who spend $5,000 on their kids at Christmas time (a mom actually told me herself). Our old neighbors probably spent $5,000 for their cars!!

This leads me to the title of this post. Money does NOT equal class. I think there might have been a time when that was true. But no longer. Education, money, "success", do NOT give you any sense of social grace, personal responsibility, or culture. What they give you is a big house and a license to look down your nose at the "poor folk" who live in those "bad neighborhoods". People feel the size of their mortgage entitles them to act like a foul-mouthed fool and call it "humor" or worse yet call it "humility". Yes! This is how this low-class, uncultured, unsophisticated, sophmoric behavior is viewed. "See me with my beer and my occasional f-bomb? I'm keeping it real. I haven't let this nice neighborhood and my big house go to my head. I can still hang out and fit in like a 'regular guy'. I am humble despite my 'success'. "

As for people like me. I am tolerated. I am a stuck up, self-righteous, prude. I really should get off my homeschooling, church going high horse! Maybe I should learn to "mix it up" with a little "fun" with the neighbors. I'm sooo up tight you know? I guess I'm just another one of those right wing radical extremists I hear about. The women here think they need to "convert" me or else they just avoid me like the plague. I had one neighbor say "You know what I'd love to do for you Kristan? I'd love to take you out one night and get you drunk and have you dance on the table tops with me!" Guess what lady? Been there. Done that. (little do they know...) I did something most in this neighborhood have not. I GREW UP!

I guess that's the main difference I see in people. It's not the money they make or the house or neighborhood they live in. It's not the level of education they have or even their age. It's not their race or religion. It's not even their level of religious fervor or committment ( I know that may bother some for me to say but it's true). It really comes down to a matter of those people who continue to live their lives as selfish spoiled little teenagers into their 30's, 40's, 50's, and beyond and those people who grow up and continue to grow, striving to become a better, more decent contributing member of this world. There are people who feel an obligation or better yet an opportunity to do something good for the world even if that simply means helping carry up your neighbors' garbage cans or enthusiastically congratulating them on another baby. Then there are people who feel and obligation only to themselves to do whatever is "good" for them even if that simply means keeping up your neighbor until 3AM with your foul mouthed "children"!!

Hopefully the little "men" have cursed themselves to sleep by now and I can go to bed...

Who Are We?

I started off this post (which I now have deleted) by listing a number of headlines from the news. All of them were examples of how twisted and lost we have become as a people in regards to our relationship to others, to ourselves, and to God - our Creator.
I decided to just skip all the depressing headlines/articles and just get to the root of it all.

Who are we? Some may even prefer What are we? I don't think the average educated (college educated even) adult today could give you a sensible complete thoughtful response to that question. "Uh, well, we're humans" Ok so what does THAT mean? "Uh, well, it means we are the highest form of animal on the planet and that we can uh, think and stuff" You may even get an "enlightened" response like "Uh, well, we are made by God and we have a soul and stuff like that will never die" And so what does THIS demand of us? "Uh, well, like what do you mean DEMAND?" "Like it just means that when we die we're gonna go to heaven ya know" Ah, I see...

Pathetic!
I assure you that this fake dialogue isn't too far from the truth of it! I don't expect an average person to be able to articulate the deep spiritual/theological dimensions of our existence at the drop of a hat. But, I don't think that this total lack of thought and consideration of the purpose of our existence is a good sign. This is what's at the root of all those depressing, often sexually twisted, death-filled headlines. We haven't a clue as to who we are, why we are here, and what the answers to these then demands of us.

So, we carry on like animals with degrees and cell phones. We act out every impulsive desire for the sake of gratifying every pleasure possible. We have become extremely sophisticated PIGS! Pigs who drive, pigs who earn, pigs who spend, pigs who read (err, rather watch tv), pigs who have figured out how to "screw" without producing any other piglets, and ultimately pigs who've learned how to rationalize every piggish behavior so that we all can be rest assured to die and go to "pig heaven" someday!

I am surely not devoid of certain piggish tendencies myself. But I call a spade a spade, or in this case a pig a pig! I sadly have been blind to my own selfishness and self-serving rationalizations. But now, thank God, I see. What an ugly mess I see. There are many dramatic illustrations of what a mess we've made of our own humanity. But, I don't personally live those headlines I read about, or the stories that make me cringe or worse cry.

What I do live and see from day to day is the reality of any other average American woman. I see the blindness of so many all around me, right here in suburbia. I am so sad for them. Deep down I don't think most of these people are really happy. There's a lot of surface pleasure that tries to pass itself off as fulfillment and joy. But dig just a little deeper and you find an emptiness that is truly sad.

How many women I have met or spoken to who either complain incessantly about their lives or who brag obnoxiously about their "pants-wearing" freedom and domination over their "errand-boy" husbands. How many men have I met or spoken to who aren't really men yet. They ogle and comment on the teen aged girls in our neighborhood. They drink a cold one on their driveway with the other"men" and discuss the next "toy" they plan to buy while they try to avoid their nagging wives' demands to "honey do this or that". How many kids have I met or spoken to whose parents pay them no attention at all. They seem a little surprised by my interest in them and their lives/opinions. Who is this cookie neighbor lady and why does she actually talk to me for more than 2 minutes? Kids who have to deal with foul language of the most disturbing nature on the bus ride to school, kids who learn what "****job" means in the 3rd grade, kids who aspire to be a "pop singer when I grow up" or a professional athlete of some kind.

Often these folks are Catholic, or another denomination even. As for the Catholics I meet, they haven't a clue about their faith and frankly they couldn't care less. Religion is more of a hobby than anything else to those I have come to meet and know. They try to maintain their "hobby" as best they can. If there's a conflict then that's just too bad for mass, or dogma. God will understand.

Sex. Sex is a whole other aspect of this blindness, this emptiness that pervades our culture. We haven't a clue who we are, why we are here, and we certainly haven't the slightest idea about our sexuality in Truth. Sex is like religion. It's another hobby we enjoy. We make time for it and try to get the most "bang for our buck" so to speak. (please excuse the inadvertent pun) We want to maximize pleasure and eliminate all responsibility or consequence.

Children are a burden. we tolerate two for the sake of "fitting in" and leave it at that. Why would anyone want anymore? Too many kids can be bad for your social life, not to mention your pocket book ya know?

Women get "boob jobs" and "tummy tucks" and enlist the help of personal trainers all in an effort to out due their own teenage daughters. Gotta be as sexy as a sixteen year old. The sickness is twofold. First of all a sixteen year old needn't be "sexy"! and Secondly, why do grown women feel so driven to maintain femininity by regressing to a teen-like look and attitude? Why not embrace the most authentic display of femininity there is on earth - motherhood?

The irony of this sexual confusion/desire is that most women I've met who are "so done having kids" and "just want their bodies back "(to be sexy/hot) are the same women who complain about their husbands "bugging them" for sex too much. Well, that whole contraception, getting "fixed" thing is really doing wonders for ya then huh? NOT! I've never seen more women so miserable and unhappy and yet needy and insecure than those who have either had sterilization imposed upon them or have decided to impose it upon their husbands. In one breath they'll tell me how they had their husband "get his stuff fixed" and in the next they'll be telling me how uninterested they are in their husbands' advances and how much they'd just rather sleep!

I know I'm just a backward, simpleton barefoot and pregnant traditionalist and all, but I thought that the whole reason for people getting themselves (or their spouse) "fixed" was so they could ENJOY sex without consequences! Seems to me that when we treat ourselves and those we purpose to love, like animals, the whole mystery/magic just goes right out of sex. I guess if I had altered intentionally my body or my husband's body like one alters their dog's or cat's, then I too might feel not so interested. We kid ourselves into thinking it won't matter. But it does.

The reason it does matter is that we are ultimately made in the Divine image. God wants to lift us up. The more we lower ourselves the harder it is to experience real joy. We may experience pleasure - but my dog gets pleasure from a steak bone too! But joy, fulfillment, true peace, can only come from God. Only in heaven will we experience this fully. But Jesus came and took on flesh and died here on earth so that we could get a glimpse of this here and NOW! Every time we lower our standards for ourselves, our spouse, our kids, we move further and further away from this Divine revelation. God wants to reveal to us the true joy that is possible to attain in a life lived for Him. But it seems we've forgotten that that's what life is for.

Who made you? God made me.
Why did God make you? God made me to know Him, to love Him, and to serve Him and to be happy with Him forever in Heaven.

This is who we are. We are children of the Living God. Through Jesus sacrifice we have been made heirs to His kingdom. We are royalty people! We aren't pigs with cell phones. We have been chosen. We have been called. We have been saved by a God who loves us.

We are here on earth to serve Him. We serve Him by serving OTHERS not OURSELVES! We are called to see our bodies as an important extension of God's Divine Plan. Our bodies are not tools to be used. They must reflect the very best of us - the Divine Image stamped into us by God Himself. We must live our lives like this and then encourage our brothers and sisters to do the same.

So much joy awaits those who would open their eyes and see. For those, like myself, who have covered their eyes there is hope for them still to be opened. What is required? Ask. Simply ask for them to be opened and then you will see. The hardest part of it is you see EVERYTHING. You see the beauty of God's creation and His Church, and His plan just for you, but you also see a world that's lost its way. Then you feel compelled to blog about it...

Revisiting an old post...it always comes back to sex doesn't it?

I am re-posting a portion of an old post I had written in response to a gay Catholic who feels that the love between same sex partners (and their sexual acts) are just as legitimate and complete an expression of love as husband and wife, their love and their marital embrace. This whole mess in Boulder, CO with the high school "seminar" has got me thinking about these basic issues once again. Why are we all so confused about what sex means? How have we gotten so twisted and distorted that we claim to be so very "enlightened" and "sophisticated now in the 21st century yet it seems to me we just sink further and further into animalistic behaviors and then rationalize our piggishness by calling it "liberation"


kris thinks...: Sex In God's Plan: "Clearly, many in modern society today see this as a non issue anymore. With the wide acceptance of artificial contraception, the sexual act has become defined as an urge or instinct to be managed. Modern science has gone beyond the scientific when it presumes that its knowledge can erase man's soul and therefore his God-given identity as well. We must remember that science provides knowledge not Truth. Scientists argue we are merely highly intelligent, highly evolved animals. Sex is merely an instinct or urge which we can choose to respond to in a variety of ways to satisfy. This type of argument supports the thesis of homosexuality as just another type of human love/sexual expression, no better and no worse than heterosexuality.

But those who admit that there is a God, and that we are made in His image, and have a soul and an ultimate destiny to become perfect as to attain heaven, cannot argue from science's premise then. Taking God's creation seriously we must really look at ourselves and our bodies, and see the mystical meaning God has inscribed in them. There in lies the answer to the question the author asked early on in his article: '...should the design dictate the reality of human experience, or should the diverse reality of human experience inform our understanding of the design? God thinks very highly of the human body. God found it a worthy place to live, hiding Himself within his mother's womb. He elevated the human body to its highest dignity by taking it on Himself. We should think MORE of it, not less. It is not a tool to be used to satisfy the demands of human experience. It is a powerful witness to The Truth. Let us listen to it then and the Truth will set us Free."

Boulder High TellsStudents to Have Sex, Use Drugs

Here's the O'Reily Show that inspired my rant below...

High School Today - "have sex do drugs"

Just got done watching Bill O'Reily talk about what occurred at Boulder High School. The kids there attended a "seminar" in which the speakers encouraged them to "experiment" but "be safe" about it kids...A more detailed report can be found at WorldNetDaily: We blew sex seminar, school chief says: (one of the quotes)"'I am going to encourage you to have sex and encourage you to use drugs appropriately,' Becker said.
'Why I am going to take that position is because you are going to do it anyway,' he continued. 'I think as a psychologist and health educator, it is more important to educate you in a direction that you might actually stick to. "

This just angers me to no end. That puts it mildly. I actually started to yell at the tv and then Tim suggested I shut our back door and close the family room windows... Who am I the most angry with? The parents! It seems that they (w/ a few exceptions) aren't really bothered by any of this. They accept this kind of CRAP as a legitimate component of a "well-rounded" education! Many probably are too stupid or totally devoid of any conscience in which to guide them but the rest are most likely indifferent cowards who go along to get along. Somewhere deep down they KNOW that this is not the best thing for their kids to be indoctrinated with but they shrug their shoulders and say "well, it's not SO bad I guess...no harm done really..."
Why do we expect so little of our kids? Why do we cater to their weaknesses and temptations? Why do we feel like it is impossible to raise a child with morals and standards and purity?
The answer. Because if we do this, if we demand this, or expect this of our children then we must live up to those same expectations. Most parents who cater to their kids' weaknesses are the very parents who dismiss or explain away their own selfishness or sinfulness. I must rationalize everything including the stolen innocence of my own children or else I am subject to my own conscience, if I still have one.
I saw this very thing happen last year. My girls attended a Catholic school last year. Our diocese put into place a "sex abuse prevention program". The particular program was "Talking About Touching" one of the worst. I did my research and went to the diocese, the pastor, the DRE and the principal with my information and my concerns. I got stonewalled. To my face it was all "Oh Mrs. ****** we understand. You are such good parents and you really stay on top of things....(more a** kissing) ...but this program is needed for those kids whose parents just don't give the time and attention needed to these matters..."
At the "review of materials" meeting only maybe 10 or so other parents even bothered to show up! The director of blah-be-blah from the diocese was called in specifically to "combat" me in case my and Tim's "opposition" got "out of hand". To put it succinctly we were railroaded and treated like crap!
The other parents at that meeting all explained away their "discomfort" with the program by saying that the world is a dangerous place and that their kids might as well find that out now and "be prepared". What about their innocence? What about OUR responsibility to protect them? Well, they can't stay innocent forever you know. As parents we can't protect them all the time...when they go stay the night at a friend's or ride their bike in the neighborhood, or they're with the babysitter...we can't always be there you know. We might as well "arm them" with ALL the facts and let them "protect themselves".
Well, damn it! That's NOT their job! That's OUR job! I am sick and tired of parents forcing their own children to "grow up" (translation - lose their innocence) so that the parents can maintain their own CHILDISH desires! This Boulder H.S. event is just one more such occasion. Parents who relinquish all their parental authority to the "educators" who in turn spiritually rape our kids and then tell us how much better our kids are for it!

SOLDIER Lyrics - by SHAWN HLOOKOFF : Lyrics And Songs

SOLDIER Lyrics - by SHAWN HLOOKOFF : Lyrics And Songs: "
Some people say, I'm a fighter
Some people hate what I do
I stand for my country
I stand for you

I got a family that loves me
They respect what I do
Try telling your child you're leaving
Believe me it's a hard thing to do

So, If I die don't judge me
Cause, I will not judge you
And If I die, please accept it
Cause, I will die for you

We have our reasons
Rules, morals and beliefs
I won't slander your opinion
I'm just searching for peace

So, If I die don't judge me
Cause, I will not judge you
And If I die, please accept it
Cause, I will die for you "

Soldier Memorial Day tribute

This is an amazing song sung by an artist I had not been familar with. The words are very powerful and yet well-balanced. Please I encourage ALL OF YOU to watch this short video and reflect on the willing sacrifices our soldiers make on our behalf.

God Bless Our Soldiers - Kris