a while ago I wrote a post about my cousin Jenny dying at the young age of 23. This is her singing in high school. She already had an amzing voice!! I play this cd of her and I really feel like the world lost a beautiful soul!! love you Jenny!
Friday, February 8, 2008
TOB Anthem?
I love this song first of all. But as I lstened to it again today I thought to myself it would make a great "theme song" or "anthem" for Theology of the Body. If I had the time and the talents I would LOVE to assemble a video clip/picture montage to accompany this song to introduce people to the TOB concepts - what a great "pump you up" intro it would make!
Why Buy the Cow When...?
It seems that young women are annoyed with their prospects - men who behave like boys instead of men. I found two articles on this topic of today's men failing to be REAL men and how they seem to be indefinitely stuck in perpetual adolescence. I found these articles from Dennis Prager's blog and looked over there because I often check his podcas radio show for interesting topics. I miss hearing his radio show daily - he ALWAYS covered interesting and important topics that other talk radio guys fail to cover.
Anyhow the jist of the articles goes like this - men in their 20's and 30's are failing to GROW UP and become real men. They are NOT marrying material and young women are very frustrated with this phenomena. The articles seek to discover the causes of this and they do a good job actually. Of course when I read anything I'm always reading it with a Catholic theological perspective with a definite bent on TOB. So these paragraphs jumped out at me...(SYM=single young males)
Child-Man in the Promised Land by Kay S. Hymowitz, City Journal Winter 2008:
"Like Hornby, Kunkel sees the easy availability of sex as a source of slacker apathy. In a world of serial relationships, SYMs “fail to sublimate their libidinal energies in the way that actually makes men attractive,” Kunkel told a dismayed female interviewer in Salon. With no one to challenge them to deeper connections, they swim across life’s surfaces.
The superficiality, indolence, and passionlessness evoked in Hornby’s and Kunkel’s novels haven’t triggered any kind of cultural transformation. .. The SYM doesn’t read much, remember, and he certainly doesn’t read anything prescribing personal transformation. The child-man may be into self-mockery; self-reflection is something else entirely.
That’s too bad. Men are “more unfinished as people,” Kunkel has neatly observed. Young men especially need a culture that can help them define worthy aspirations. Adults don’t emerge. They’re made."
WOW!! Although the author of this article is female she fails to connect the dots completely. We - WOMEN are to blame for these men failing to GROW UP!!! How? it's right there in the article..."With no one to challenge them to deeper connections, they swim across life's surfaces." The no one challenging them is US - WOMEN!!! We are not challenging them because we've bought into the lie that preserving our virginity untiol marriage is antiquated, old-fashioned and stifling. We are "liberated" women!! We fail to see how much men really NEED us! We are so busy trying to be like men to prove our strength that we completely miss the power we've been given and choose to throw away. We want men to be caring, responsible, protective, honorable, and self-sacrificing. That's a MAN - the kind we wan to marry and have children with. We may be demanding this with our words, as these writers do so well in their articles, but we demand nothing with our actions. We speak one thing - but our bodies are telling another story.
Pre-marital sex and the contraceptive culture have created a message that men are getting loud and clear and this childishness is simply the result of years of "hearing" this message we've spoken with our bodies. Bishop Sheen tells us that the measure of any culture is found in its women. This is because, he says, women are the leading influence on men's behavior. It is through the "demands" women make through their bodies that men "fall in line" so to speak. Why do we find men more and more immature, running from any and all responsibilities of true manhood today? Because women have failed to realize their true power. Their true power lies in embracing their weaknesses and vulnerabilities as transfoming powers over the opposite sex. True power lies in their ability to carry new life within and to support and nurture that life in a way only a woman can. "Hearing" this men will oncle again aspire to "deserve" and "earn" the love of their beloved. They will prove themselves capable and ready to protect, defend and honor this woman they seek. Then, they truly can be MAN and wife.
Sadly, sometimes I think even those men who do "settle down" and marry remain boys as well. Because their wives buy into the lie about contraception they just perpetuate the same thing they may have experienced in single life. These men seem to be grown ups because they have a job, a mortgage and a mini-van. Yet they too have failed to become the total man God wants them to be. They want the pleasure without the pain. They can't see that this last hurdle must be overcome in order that they can be a real leader of their family. Smehow even these men like the SYM of the articles (which I encourage you all to read in full), seem to demonstrate the truth found in a very old saying "Why by the cow when you get the milk for free"
Anyhow the jist of the articles goes like this - men in their 20's and 30's are failing to GROW UP and become real men. They are NOT marrying material and young women are very frustrated with this phenomena. The articles seek to discover the causes of this and they do a good job actually. Of course when I read anything I'm always reading it with a Catholic theological perspective with a definite bent on TOB. So these paragraphs jumped out at me...(SYM=single young males)
Child-Man in the Promised Land by Kay S. Hymowitz, City Journal Winter 2008:
"Like Hornby, Kunkel sees the easy availability of sex as a source of slacker apathy. In a world of serial relationships, SYMs “fail to sublimate their libidinal energies in the way that actually makes men attractive,” Kunkel told a dismayed female interviewer in Salon. With no one to challenge them to deeper connections, they swim across life’s surfaces.
The superficiality, indolence, and passionlessness evoked in Hornby’s and Kunkel’s novels haven’t triggered any kind of cultural transformation. .. The SYM doesn’t read much, remember, and he certainly doesn’t read anything prescribing personal transformation. The child-man may be into self-mockery; self-reflection is something else entirely.
That’s too bad. Men are “more unfinished as people,” Kunkel has neatly observed. Young men especially need a culture that can help them define worthy aspirations. Adults don’t emerge. They’re made."
WOW!! Although the author of this article is female she fails to connect the dots completely. We - WOMEN are to blame for these men failing to GROW UP!!! How? it's right there in the article..."With no one to challenge them to deeper connections, they swim across life's surfaces." The no one challenging them is US - WOMEN!!! We are not challenging them because we've bought into the lie that preserving our virginity untiol marriage is antiquated, old-fashioned and stifling. We are "liberated" women!! We fail to see how much men really NEED us! We are so busy trying to be like men to prove our strength that we completely miss the power we've been given and choose to throw away. We want men to be caring, responsible, protective, honorable, and self-sacrificing. That's a MAN - the kind we wan to marry and have children with. We may be demanding this with our words, as these writers do so well in their articles, but we demand nothing with our actions. We speak one thing - but our bodies are telling another story.
Pre-marital sex and the contraceptive culture have created a message that men are getting loud and clear and this childishness is simply the result of years of "hearing" this message we've spoken with our bodies. Bishop Sheen tells us that the measure of any culture is found in its women. This is because, he says, women are the leading influence on men's behavior. It is through the "demands" women make through their bodies that men "fall in line" so to speak. Why do we find men more and more immature, running from any and all responsibilities of true manhood today? Because women have failed to realize their true power. Their true power lies in embracing their weaknesses and vulnerabilities as transfoming powers over the opposite sex. True power lies in their ability to carry new life within and to support and nurture that life in a way only a woman can. "Hearing" this men will oncle again aspire to "deserve" and "earn" the love of their beloved. They will prove themselves capable and ready to protect, defend and honor this woman they seek. Then, they truly can be MAN and wife.
Sadly, sometimes I think even those men who do "settle down" and marry remain boys as well. Because their wives buy into the lie about contraception they just perpetuate the same thing they may have experienced in single life. These men seem to be grown ups because they have a job, a mortgage and a mini-van. Yet they too have failed to become the total man God wants them to be. They want the pleasure without the pain. They can't see that this last hurdle must be overcome in order that they can be a real leader of their family. Smehow even these men like the SYM of the articles (which I encourage you all to read in full), seem to demonstrate the truth found in a very old saying "Why by the cow when you get the milk for free"
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Happy Birthday to Daddy - Tim
hey I just tried for the very first time to upload video to a youtube account and then paste it here on my blog!! It worked!! Hooray!! I think I might try to do more of this from now on... Oh and for those of you who have never heard my voice before - my deepest apologies for making you suffer through a really bad off key rendition of "Happy Birthday" plus "verse two"!! I STINK at singing!!
LIVE! - Talking with "Kel" - Cheap version of a web-cam
This me talking to Kelly while holding baby and also typing on keyboard with one finger. Kelly needed cheering up...
Cheering Kelly Up
Kelly's house was a mess. Kelly had to clean up and lacked motivation. Kelly felt BAD. I assured her MY house was messy too!! Cheer up Kel, your little sister is way behind in her "to do' list too
It's the Culture Stupid
Well Mitt is out of the race. I just watched his address at CPAC. As I listened to Mr. Romney I felt like asking "Why weren't you talking like this all along Mitt?" i think he'd have fared better if he'd given this type of address from the get go.
If you watched this speech as I did you heard Mr. Romney talk about the culture. He emphasized the transforming power of culture and how everything else are just ripples left by its impact. THIS is the message America needs to hear and understand.
The economy, the healthcare system, the minimum wage, the schools, the social security system, taxes, gov't programs, are all meaningless if our culture's in the toilet!! Americans must be inspired to aspire to greatness through sacrifice not coddled like children waiting to be spoonfed by the gov't.
What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet lose his soul?
Sad to say Mc Cain doesn't get it and he'll continue to belittle and disregard true conservatives because he fails to see - it's the culture stupid!
If you watched this speech as I did you heard Mr. Romney talk about the culture. He emphasized the transforming power of culture and how everything else are just ripples left by its impact. THIS is the message America needs to hear and understand.
The economy, the healthcare system, the minimum wage, the schools, the social security system, taxes, gov't programs, are all meaningless if our culture's in the toilet!! Americans must be inspired to aspire to greatness through sacrifice not coddled like children waiting to be spoonfed by the gov't.
What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet lose his soul?
Sad to say Mc Cain doesn't get it and he'll continue to belittle and disregard true conservatives because he fails to see - it's the culture stupid!
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Well Fed
Over at "Et tu?": Jennifer writes - "The fun wasn't fun enough, the luxuries weren't luxurious enough, the excitement wasn't exciting enough to completely smother out that part of my soul that begged for something more. It wasn't that I wasn't grateful -- to the contrary, I regularly felt overwhelmed with gratitude for all the wonderful things in my life -- it's that there was a subtle but present sense of despair that these things weren't doing what they were supposed to do. I was kind of happy. But why wasn't I fully happy, why wasn't I completely at peace, why was I still a little bit restless, even when I technically had it all?"
She describes the dilema I see most of America in today, so clearly. Most of us "have it all". we live nice lives. We have lots of "stuff" and there's plenty of "fun" to be had. Yet, people walk around with smilig faces that seem so empty to me when I look into their eyes. They may experience pleasure but they lack JOY! This joy is the joy only knowing Jesus can bring. So they stuff themselves with pleasure after pleasure. They're like gluttoness feeders who feast on all the goodies at a holiday dinner and then head for the couch, unzip their pants, and feel full yet empty and disgusted at the same time.
We must stop snacking on pleasure thinking we'll eventually be filled, satisfied and we must feast on living bread instead! He is the real food that satifies and leaves us JOY-filled despite living lives which otherwise seem to the world to be mundane and boring. I am one of those who lives a life of mediocrity according to the world's biggest feeders. How is it then that I am filled with joyfullness? I must be a simpleton and a fool right? Nope. I'm just well-fed!
She describes the dilema I see most of America in today, so clearly. Most of us "have it all". we live nice lives. We have lots of "stuff" and there's plenty of "fun" to be had. Yet, people walk around with smilig faces that seem so empty to me when I look into their eyes. They may experience pleasure but they lack JOY! This joy is the joy only knowing Jesus can bring. So they stuff themselves with pleasure after pleasure. They're like gluttoness feeders who feast on all the goodies at a holiday dinner and then head for the couch, unzip their pants, and feel full yet empty and disgusted at the same time.
We must stop snacking on pleasure thinking we'll eventually be filled, satisfied and we must feast on living bread instead! He is the real food that satifies and leaves us JOY-filled despite living lives which otherwise seem to the world to be mundane and boring. I am one of those who lives a life of mediocrity according to the world's biggest feeders. How is it then that I am filled with joyfullness? I must be a simpleton and a fool right? Nope. I'm just well-fed!
Monday, February 4, 2008
We Love Our Baby
We love this little guy. When a new baby comes into this family he or she always becomes the center of attention. Christopher is no different. The kids love to hold, talk to and play with him. They love having another little baby in the family. I have never had to deal with jealousy or resentment in my home due to a new baby. I feel like that is in large part because Tim and I both always emphasize two things with our kids. 1. Babies are a great and wonderful gift from God to us. 2. You are not the center of the universe therefore sacrifice is mandatory, not optional
.I think this combo must be working. Even in those moments when my kids are leaning heavily towards the selfishness and self-centeredness that is naturally in us all from birth, if I remind them of how ugly or hurtful it is to be selfish they generally "wake up" and change their tune. Example: "Morgan hold the baby for me while I make dinner ok?" "mom (in an extremely whiney voice) I don't want to he wiggles too much and he pulls my hair...(the reality is she wants to watch Cyberchase on PBS and doesn't want to be bothered) "Morgan - your brother needs you and so do I now stop it and hold him 'cause he loves you so much just look at him!" Christopher with perfect timing looks at his big sis and gives her a drooly wet grin. "Ok mom - come here Chris you wittle cutie - I love you too I love you too..."Morgan walks off with him and continues her baby talk to him happily.
Last night Tim and I were watching Nancy Grace and she was discussing a case of a 3 mth old baby found on the side of the road. They played the 911 call from the man who found the baby while he and his wife were walking together. He was weeping on the line. Tim and I both listened and I cried too of course. We were so caught up in the story and the details of this horrible case we failed to notice that it had caught the attention of Morgan and Mary Grace who had come into the room to say goodnight to us. They started asking a lot of questions. I always tell them these kinds of truths very gently. But I always tell the truth. I never lie to them about the evil in the world but I always gives them a sense of HOPE that this is not how the world will always be. I use these moments to teach them that God wants them to grow and learn so that they can make this world a better place. Their lives make a difference and their prayers are powerful. We all prayed together...Morgan reminded me "Mom he's a saint now." "Yes I know Morgan I just wish this world would be a better place" "It will be mom"
This morning as we prayed the rosary in the car as I drove the girls to school Mary interrupted "Mom I'm thinking of that baby." "Me too Mary." We finished the rosary. I looked back over my shoulder to see the faces of my kids. They love their baby. They love that baby. They love ALL babies. I felt proud. I must be doing something right.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Womanhood
There is far too much "loving yourself" and far too little knowing yourself going on today. There are thousands of books that tell us the benefits of self-love - especially for women who are portrayed as the helpless victims of a male dominated world.
"We women must learn to love ourselves." "I am woman, hear me roar." "Empower women!" etc. are modern mantras. But what are we loving? Why are we roaring? What are we doing with this "empowerment"? Those who subscribe to these mantras fail to tell us what the ultimate model of womanhood is, so that we can best exemplify that model in our lives. Why is there no model?
Another modern distortion is to blame for this void. "To each his own" or in this case "her own" We mustn't have a standard defintion of womanhood because standard definitions or requirements are by their very nature oppressive and discriminitory. To lay down a model of womanhood would be seen as stiffling individuality and that is a cardinal sin today.
Yet, the very opposite is true. An entire generation of young women has lost their sense of identity as woman. A basic standard for defining authentic womanhood liberates, uplifts, and inspires creativity and individuality. There is a desperate need today for my generation and the young girls we are attempting to raise, to have a very clear idea of the authentic womanhood to which they are called.
Baby boomer mothers seeking to protect their own daughters from the hurts they experienced chose to blame womanhood itself for their suffering. Any abuse or injustice or oppression was the result of living out an old model of womanhood. They would not pass that on to their own daughters - and here we are today. We have no idea who we are, what our purpose is in life, and we're floundering.
Womanhood got left behind in the rubble of the 60's and 70's. The failure of men to honor and appreciate the beauty of woman, and the failure of women to persevere despite this, has left us with the false notion that happiness for women can be found by seeking power, authority, and control. Essentially we've abandoned womanhood to become instead, men.
Are we happy? No. Use of anti-anxiety and anti-depressant drugs are at an all time high among women. Divorce, single motherhood, and out-of-wedlock births are rampant. We drink, eat, and shop to fill the void. We climb social ladders, and corporate ladders to satisfy the internal ache. No, we are far from happy.
We do it all and have it all. We treat the men in our lives as useful idiots. This portrayal is quite common on tv and other media. Women are the self-sufficient pants wearers. Men are sperm donors who should do what their wives want, contribute financially, and please sexually. Children are more a right of passage than a mystery and gift. They're a necessary burden we take on and then desperately wait to be rid of so that we can get back to "really living".
We see our bodies as tools to gain power and at the same time obstacles to power. The sexual, seductive aspects of the female body are used to gain power. The procreative nurturing aspects of the female body are seen as a hinderance and at times a curse.
We relate to men with these two twisted ideas always influencing us. We want to be loved but fail to love. Rather we tempt and seduce and then wonder why love fades away or turns cold. We failed to illicit love from men in the first place. We have an obligation to teach men how to love. We teach them how to desire, but not how to love. When they fail to love us we scream of betrayal and seeth with rage over the failings of the opposite sex. We can't see a failure (our failure) in the beginning is a failure indeed.
All this mess separates us from God. We move futher and further away from authentic womanhood and as a result move further away from God. We feel empty, betrayed and abandoned. We swear we won't let this happen to our daughters. We teach them to reject their womanhood and embrace the modern lies. The pattern continues.
Young girls today have no idea what it means to be a woman. They see their breasts as sexual assets, not miraculous baby feeders. They see their womb as a dangerous necessity to be guarded not out of a sense of honor but fear. They see their cycles as a nuisance, not a reminder of their creative power. They say they love themselves. They say they are in control of their bodies and their lives. Yet they seem so unhappy and they are. There is an emptiness they try to fill with the world and all it offers. That emptiness can only be remedied by living out a life as an auhentic woman. Not a cookie cutter woman. Not an old-fashioned apron wearing woman. We simply need to embrace the gifts we've been given along with the sacrifices that are asked of us - happiness lies there.
"We women must learn to love ourselves." "I am woman, hear me roar." "Empower women!" etc. are modern mantras. But what are we loving? Why are we roaring? What are we doing with this "empowerment"? Those who subscribe to these mantras fail to tell us what the ultimate model of womanhood is, so that we can best exemplify that model in our lives. Why is there no model?
Another modern distortion is to blame for this void. "To each his own" or in this case "her own" We mustn't have a standard defintion of womanhood because standard definitions or requirements are by their very nature oppressive and discriminitory. To lay down a model of womanhood would be seen as stiffling individuality and that is a cardinal sin today.
Yet, the very opposite is true. An entire generation of young women has lost their sense of identity as woman. A basic standard for defining authentic womanhood liberates, uplifts, and inspires creativity and individuality. There is a desperate need today for my generation and the young girls we are attempting to raise, to have a very clear idea of the authentic womanhood to which they are called.
Baby boomer mothers seeking to protect their own daughters from the hurts they experienced chose to blame womanhood itself for their suffering. Any abuse or injustice or oppression was the result of living out an old model of womanhood. They would not pass that on to their own daughters - and here we are today. We have no idea who we are, what our purpose is in life, and we're floundering.
Womanhood got left behind in the rubble of the 60's and 70's. The failure of men to honor and appreciate the beauty of woman, and the failure of women to persevere despite this, has left us with the false notion that happiness for women can be found by seeking power, authority, and control. Essentially we've abandoned womanhood to become instead, men.
Are we happy? No. Use of anti-anxiety and anti-depressant drugs are at an all time high among women. Divorce, single motherhood, and out-of-wedlock births are rampant. We drink, eat, and shop to fill the void. We climb social ladders, and corporate ladders to satisfy the internal ache. No, we are far from happy.
We do it all and have it all. We treat the men in our lives as useful idiots. This portrayal is quite common on tv and other media. Women are the self-sufficient pants wearers. Men are sperm donors who should do what their wives want, contribute financially, and please sexually. Children are more a right of passage than a mystery and gift. They're a necessary burden we take on and then desperately wait to be rid of so that we can get back to "really living".
We see our bodies as tools to gain power and at the same time obstacles to power. The sexual, seductive aspects of the female body are used to gain power. The procreative nurturing aspects of the female body are seen as a hinderance and at times a curse.
We relate to men with these two twisted ideas always influencing us. We want to be loved but fail to love. Rather we tempt and seduce and then wonder why love fades away or turns cold. We failed to illicit love from men in the first place. We have an obligation to teach men how to love. We teach them how to desire, but not how to love. When they fail to love us we scream of betrayal and seeth with rage over the failings of the opposite sex. We can't see a failure (our failure) in the beginning is a failure indeed.
All this mess separates us from God. We move futher and further away from authentic womanhood and as a result move further away from God. We feel empty, betrayed and abandoned. We swear we won't let this happen to our daughters. We teach them to reject their womanhood and embrace the modern lies. The pattern continues.
Young girls today have no idea what it means to be a woman. They see their breasts as sexual assets, not miraculous baby feeders. They see their womb as a dangerous necessity to be guarded not out of a sense of honor but fear. They see their cycles as a nuisance, not a reminder of their creative power. They say they love themselves. They say they are in control of their bodies and their lives. Yet they seem so unhappy and they are. There is an emptiness they try to fill with the world and all it offers. That emptiness can only be remedied by living out a life as an auhentic woman. Not a cookie cutter woman. Not an old-fashioned apron wearing woman. We simply need to embrace the gifts we've been given along with the sacrifices that are asked of us - happiness lies there.
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