Not Selfish - Just Human

So, I spoke with my sister overseas yesterday and confided in her many things...
In the final analysis of my psyche she determined that I need two things.
1. More time for me - just me - doing something I enjoy
2. Time with my husband - just us - doing something together I completely agree with her! I always do! I've had the same conversation with her a hundred times and I get the same advice every time. I assure her that "I'm really gonna do it this time" and take the initiative to make a change that will benefit myself and my whole family in turn.
But every time I hang up that phone tha same old excuses hold me back...That would be so selfish of you to leave your children to do something frivolous like work out...Just die to yourself Kris...come on! there's people starving to death in this world and you're complaining about not feeling "connected" to hubby enough and needing an "outlet" for motherhood frustrations? What a self centered jerk you are Kris!
And so it goes. Another pep talk down the drain. Back to leafing through catalogues and eating chocolate on the sneak...then feeling guilty and then on to self loathing...then on to another phone call..."Kel, it's Kris. Got a minute? I need a pep talk..."
So, in comes another hair brained idea - I'll blog! That'll give me a sense of having my own space and time. Yeah right! I've just been interupted at least 5 times while writing this by one of my 4 kids and at one point all 4 at once. Gotta go break up a sibling quarrel...